Oh!
Ahhhh!
♪
Ahhhh!
♪
Counterfeit Cat!
You know, Gark,
I have a funny feeling Betty's eyesight is getting worse.
Come on, Maxie.
You've gained so much junk in your trunk.
I wonder what she can see.
There it is!
Why am I even walking?
Whoa! Someone wants his Fish'n'Cream biscuits!
Yeah, but I need to be alive to eat them!
Max! Whoa!
Excuse me, but is this the pet shop?
Sure is, but you can't bring that in here.
Hmph! Some animal lover you are!
Ahh! Whoa!
Oh, you're a feisty one!
I'm not looking forward to the journey home.
Thank goodness that's over.
Fish'n'Cream bickies coming right up, boys!
Fish'n'Cream! Even their name sounds like moonlight!
♪
Ah, you have to try them. Some of them. A couple.
Uh, you can have one.
Dog biscuits?!
Nooo!
It's good, Max. You should try 'em.
We have to fix her useless eyes.
Hey, you with the useless eyes!
Have I got a deal for you!
Over here.
Follow my voice.
Come to the Fly-By-Night Laser Eye Clinic!
I can see! I can see!
And here's your bill!
I don't want to see! I don't want to see!
That's it!
We can't afford it, Gark!
We'll just have to do it ourselves.
Yeah! That's exactly...
Wait. What?!
Well, I can do lasers.
Ahh!
We're talking precision optical surgery here, Gark.
Oh!
You mean like this.
Ah. I do make a lovely masterpiece.
So, how are we going to do this? Hmm?
Got any anaesthetic?
Oh, hello th...
That'll work.
This'll be easy.
First I'll just remove these weird
pieces of skin over the eyes.
No! They're her eyelids.
Oh, gosh!
The things you learn when you're performing surgery!
Well, here we go!
What have you done?!
I made her eyes stronger!
Whoa! No arguments there.
What a lovely, sunny day.
Better get some sunglasses!
Oh, a documentary on fires!
Sure hope they'll have some hunky firemen.
Unbelievable. She's worse than ever!
Only now she's destroying everything I love!
We have to stop her.
She'll burn the flat to the ground...
and we'll end up penniless buskers!
Fix her!
I don't know how!
Unless she has a "Reset to defaults" button.
I got it! We'll take her to that laser surgery clinic.
They've got to have a customer complaints desk!
But we're not customers!
That's my first complaint!
Come on!
"Scratch-scratch", already!
Walkies? What a good idea.
I can get some new sunglasses.
Everything's so bright today.
Oh, the movie theater!
Come on, kitties. Let's see what's on.
Fish'n'Cream...
She's destroying everything!
Look up!
Oh!
♪
Simpson!
Don't just stand there like a pile of carbonized ash!
Get me more tea!
Yes, my lord.
Max, what is wrong with you?
Why are you acting all wack?
Quick!
Oh, 3-D glasses!
Nice!
Come on.
Or...
Oh, kitties, it looks like the movie's about to start!
Are we really using Betty's laser eyes to steal.
Fish'n'Cream biscuits from a pet shop?
Well, what would you do with them?
It's starting, it's starting, it's starting!
Just goes to show... everything works out fine
when you do home laser-eye surgery!
Attention, earthlings!
Our race have always lived in peace...
until now!
Surrender or face our wrath!
Oh, he sounds so strong and masterful.
Oh, you've gone and done it now!
Here comes the action sequence!
You monster.
This is war!
Oh, it's so interactive!
Ahh! Ahh!
Oh...
Woo!
Hi!
As the representative of Earth, let me say
you can have what you want.
Just don't hurt me, just don't hurt...
"Want"?!
Seems your laser weapon...
Betty.
your "Betty" destroyed what was quite near and dear to me.
And now I'm going to take what is near and dear to you!
Oh. Um... This is a bit awkward, Gark.
Does it soften the blow to know you're near and dear to me?
Not really, but I understand.
My lord, I am Gark, and I am prepared to serve you!
What, that?!
I don't want that!
I want...
I want... your biscuits!
Biscuits?! What biscuits?
Those are...
Just holograms of biscuit boxes.
Nice one, Gark.
And let this be a lesson to you!
Nobody messes with the imperious race
of the Googly Eyes!
Simpson!
Sorry.
Whoa! Whoops.
I could never tell which one of us he was looking at.
A very cunning race, the Googly Eyes.
Hey, speaking of eyes...
time to get Betty's eyes fixed!
Yeah, that went well.
What a fantastic ending!
Here you go. Treats for my peeps!
Cheer up, Max.
I'm sure it'll wear off...
eventually.
Pssh. Yeah. And, until then...
all I've got are these.
I wonder if they taste better toasted.
It's alright. I can do laser tongue surgery!
What could go wrong?
Now, Gark...
The hocking up of furballs is an illustrious tradition
that requires style and grace.
Watch.
Voila! A perfect furball!
Can I do it, too?
Go for it.
Look, Max! Mine has its own moon!
Pfft. Lacks emotion.
Completely under-phlegmed.
Okay!
"Oh, look at me. I'm Gark."
I can hock up furballs the size of small cars.
"I'm so cute."
If I were an alien, I could do that, too!
But what's better than being an alien?
Taking their technology without asking!
"How to cough up bigger furballs."
Hmm. "Terms and conditions", "May cause heart to explode",
blah-dee blah-dee blah-dee blah.
Boring! Aaaaand...
"Accept."
"four seconds."
Don't see how that's possi...
Yes!
Gark. Gark.
Gark!
Oh, hey, Gark.
You're up late.
Whoa. How did you learn that?
I didn't want to show you up earlier, but I'm actually
a bit of a furball master.
I could keep doing this forever.
Whoa. When you said "forever", I didn't think you meant it.
Shouldn't you stop?
I can't!
I downloaded a furball enhancer from the codex!
Max!
I think the last one had my spleen in it.
No, it's still in here.
I think that's all of them.
Let that be a lesson to you, Gark.
Never agree to terms and conditions
without reading them first.
Uh oh!
Meep!
It's a horrible monster!
No, Max.
It's a germinal multicellular eukaryotic diploid -
what you call a "bah-bee".
Meep!
A baby?!
Like I said, a horrible monster!
No! This is good!
I've heard having an incipient life form changes you.
Changes you! Me? Uh uh.
I'm out of here. See ya!
What are we going to call him?
I'm not going to call it anything!
It's a giant, plegmy furball.
Meep.
Something mysterious,
like "Dwayne", or "Brenda", or...
Will you stop this if I name him?
Okay.
Fine. Uh...
"Phlegmy"?
Meep?
Now talk to him using his name so he can get used to it.
Oh. Okay.
Aww, Phlegmy, ...
Meep?
Get off me!
Look, Phlegmy! I made you dinner!
I don't think that's the right food for him.
Well, what do you think he'll eat?
Not my problem.
And this is a mega-zapper particle bazooka! You can...
Lasers are dangerous!
See?
I downloaded a parenting manual.
It even shows you how to build a playpen!
I'll just put your toy in.
Okay, Phlegmy. In you go for playtime!
Meep. Meep.
Meep! Meep! Meep!
Phlegmy! Get out of there!
Meep!
How do you turn it off? Ahh!
Meep.
Phlegmy!
What did you do?
I was just following the parenting manual!
This isn't a manual.
It's a death-prison thing!
At least I was trying!
Oh, I see! Now it's all my fault,
just because I didn't like you coughing up better furballs,
and just because I stole your codex,
and just because I refuse to take responsibility
for what I created!
All my fault, then, is it?
Uh... yeah.
Meep.
Hm.
Guess it does put me in a bad light, doesn't it?
But, from now on, I'll take care of everything, Gark -
just like I always do!
And I'll help -
just like I always do!
First thing to learn? Grooming.
Glide... and scrape, glide... and scrape.
Now you try it!
Excellent, Phlegmy.
Aww.
Phlegmy, watch me!
I've got no tongue!
Gark! Stop messing around!
I'm trying to "parent" here, hmm?
♪
Let's try the litter box!
Carefully step in.
Max! Betty just bought us a huge box to play with!
Come on!
I don't have the luxury of playtime.
I'm a little busy here, "parenting"!
♪
Let's try something less messy.
Playing with cat toys!
Oh, yes!
It's so much fun!
No, Gark.
Playing with cat toys is a serious matter,
requiring an enormous amount of skill and concentration.
Hoo!
Now your turn.
Phlegmy, like this!
Ohhh, Phlegmy, are you okay?
Meep.
Gark, just stop helping and leave me alone to "parent"!
♪
Come on, Phlegmy. You can do it. You can walk.
Meep.
Shh, sh-sh-sh-sh.
Meep.
Shh. You rest now, my little Phlegmy.
Max?
Will you shush?!
♪
Meep.
What is it, Gark?
Betty's left a ball of yarn out.
Since Phlegmy's asleep,
I was wondering if you wanted to unroll it with me.
Gark, I have to chart Phlegmy's sleep patterns.
Max...
We never get to have fun anymore!
You don't have time for fun when you're being
the world's greatest single parent to a furball!
Maybe... you and Phlegmy and I should...
Ahem! Did you not hear "world's greatest single
parent to a furball"?
Now run along, Gark!
♪
Aw.
Phlegmy!
Time to get up!
Phlegmy? Come on, buddy.
I've got the whole day planned!
Meep.
Huh? Excuse me?
Mee-eep.
Gark!
Something's happened to Phlegmy!
There's no life in his eyes!
He just sits and does nothing except say,
"Mee-eep."
Like, "Meep"?
No! Like, "Mee-ee-eep."
What's happened?!
Help me!
I tried to help before, but you yelled at me to stop,
so I stopped!
Ohoho! So that's your little game, is it?
Refusing to help until I apologize?
No! I was trying to do what you asked.
Fine! I was wrong, you were right,
I got carried away, blah-blah-blah-blah,
apology-apology! Now help me, Gark!
Mee-ee-eep.
Mee-eep.
Oh...
I think I know!
He's become a stage-two bio-organism -
what you call a "tee-en-aw-jer".
A teenager?!
They grow up so fast.
Like, 24 hours fast!
So... there's no way we can change him back?
Nope.
Mee-eep.
Look, Max! A flock of Phlegmys!
He needs to be with them now.
So... I'll never have to worry about his emotional needs again?
I guess not.
Mee-eep.
Woohoo! Bon voyage, Phlegmy!
So long, Phlegmy!
Write if you get work!
Or hands!
Mee-eep.
Now, about that ball of yarn...